hurt, you are no longer walking

From the first, noted that this season is tough for me. Actually have noted this in various other forums. Day one, and I can feel my heart being torn between two temporal extremes of past and future.

Can I give to forget? Can I provide what I wasn't provided? Is it all a waste since others cannot do what I can do? What all can a man give when all he has ever done is give? When does that sacrifice stop? And if all a man wants to do is sacrifice but can't, is there any greater sadness than that? And does this hurtful empathy ever stop? Do I know that hollowness of inability too well?

Frodo heads to the Grey Havens with this ache in his shoulder that no amount of magic or anything can heal. And I feel that way often each winter -- only this year comes with shard-pains from in front as well as in back. And that ache. That ache.